Things have been overwhelming lately, but I've been physically able to do a lot more! I decided to have guests over at my apartment for a "girls hangout" and I haven't had guests over in like over a year so this was HUGE to me. I finally had to do more of a "deep clean" in my apartment which I've been wanting to do for so long but just couldn't. It was a lot of work, I was quite physically exhausted, and I didn't do as deep of a clean as I had hoped but it was super close and I'm so happy about it. Having a clean home feels so good.
I still don't feel anywhere near ready to try to "get a job" somewhere, but I do need more plans in my life to get out more now that I can. Maybe I'll volunteer somewhere. We'll see. I'm hoping I don't get any major setbacks again soon.
at
September 16, 2025
I'm trying to arrange some sort of "deep tissue" massage for my neck. So far I keep getting ignored. :/
Also I switched doctors and she wanted to check my thyroid. Through the blood test we discovered my cholesterol is at astronomical levela and I likely have Familial Hypercholesterolemia. I had to change my diet overnight and I'll likely start on meds like statins soon, which sucks, because I'm already dealing with so many symptoms and the meds can ruin my neck "healing" progress - one of the potential side effects of the meds is actual muscle damage. And figuring out my new food plan and having to cook more is EXHAUSTING. I'm just so tired, I actually fantasize just moving in with my parents or grandma and just starting my life over in a way. Idk. I'm spending an insane amount of money on bills every month just to "live downtown Toronto" and I barely leave my house or bed, and now I'm making no money because of USA tarifs.
I just feel like I'm wasting my life away in so many ways right now.
Also I switched doctors and she wanted to check my thyroid. Through the blood test we discovered my cholesterol is at astronomical levela and I likely have Familial Hypercholesterolemia. I had to change my diet overnight and I'll likely start on meds like statins soon, which sucks, because I'm already dealing with so many symptoms and the meds can ruin my neck "healing" progress - one of the potential side effects of the meds is actual muscle damage. And figuring out my new food plan and having to cook more is EXHAUSTING. I'm just so tired, I actually fantasize just moving in with my parents or grandma and just starting my life over in a way. Idk. I'm spending an insane amount of money on bills every month just to "live downtown Toronto" and I barely leave my house or bed, and now I'm making no money because of USA tarifs.
I just feel like I'm wasting my life away in so many ways right now.
at
September 01, 2025
I'm finally a bit better in the past week. I can function way more and actually walk around more. I still rest a few times a day because I don't want to "overdo" anything by being upright the entire day. But I'm glad I can do more chores and clean more. I do want to exercise more beause I've lost all my muscle and gained a little bit of weight, but I'm also kinda scared because it's possible that my exercises sessions could have been hwat triggered my recent setback. But I don't know. Just gonna take things slow, again. Such a slow process...
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